Part 2 of UKM life

The part 2 comes in a few second later after part 1,
Because i just have special feeling tonight,
The mood of writing blog,
It's was always been it,
I follows my heart to do whatever i wanted...

This time i will talk details about my coursemate,
introduce my roommate and com mate (hostel-mate)

My coursemate is always 4 of us,
A very very cool Lee Ji Wang,
where he is only 19 year old this year,
I need to call him dailou which i really not satisfy (kidding)
But he is a responsible but a naughty guy
as he like to tease others people in a serious manner,
he is just funny...
Next is our da gai jie,
she is from Muar, Johor names Tee Su Ching,
she is a STPM Student who is always good in communication,
a little bit forgetful and used to sleep A LOT...
haha, by the way thank you her for fetching me by her cute motorcycle to class everyday,
The last one is a cute sista Tan Yik Jia
She is 19 year old too
but she didnt sound matching with her true age
she is more likely to be a kido..
She has weird action - she likes to bite people, and I and her victim all the times
Anyway she is a good listener and a good learning partner
she is truly hardworking but don't stress too much ya!!

The First Birthday celebration with my dearest coursemate - Su Ching with all second years senior :)

The first Midterm exam in Dewan Kuliah at night - a picture before getting on the Static exam :)

A very early class in the lazy Friday, having the most boring class - Professionalism of Engineering
This lasting 2.5 Hours - Chilling before the class start :)

Besides them,
A group of first year engineering students come from department of :
- Electronic and electrical, Computering & Communication, Microelectronic ( JKEES)
- Chemical, Biochemical (KP)
- Mechanical (MB)
- Architecture

We are one family and always get involve in activites :)

The Engineering Faculty Girls for 1st Year of 2013/2014

Supporting the Pesta Tanglung organised by my hostel - KRK

The first year engineering faculty that went for a charity selling Carnival 

We are spiritual cool :)

Next it goes to my roommate -  Kelly Mah

She is a 20 year old girl comes from Air Tawar, Perak..

A cute and sometimes insane girl who loves Korean very much,

We can talk a lot and play a lot 

She is currently studying psychology course in UKM and she is 4 flat scholar in STPM :)

But she used to stress a lot, glad to have a cutie roommate,

The best actress of the comnight of KRK 2013/2014 

After that, let's introduce my next door neighbour - Wendy and Shi Qi

Both of them are just OMG cute and pretty...

Shi Qi and Kelly are born in the SAME year and SAME day!!! 

520!! 

haha 

They first time thought that they took the wrong matics card...

A very sweet sweet combination..

Wendy is a Actuarial Science girl from matriculation and the only 19th Girls in block E,

while Shi Qi is student having course in Food Science..

The 4 Block E girl 

From the left Winnie, WanYing, Wendy, Shiqi and Kelly

When the day passes,

I started to love the environment I'm situated now..

The harmony environment with a peaceful members around,

It lights up my 1st Year 1 Semester Memories in University..

I hopes beautiful life still goes on :)

Continuing shinning ans stunning :)

When the time i starting to enjoy my course,

the additional Germany language,

Sehr Gut !!!

Although i still weak in my static and dynamic but i hope i can catch up very very very soon..

When you start to enjoy and accept it 

and not keep asking why ad if to yourself

you will wonder

you start study every single thing in your life

It's all about process of learning,

Although your output is good or the bad,

But i still wondering why i will get into this pathway

Engineering- the civil engineering 

It is a doubt and question for me..

Never forget what my senior said to me :

It's a faith for me to come UKM,

The faith leading me to civil engineering,

The god had arrange for me,

Just let it be.

Undeniable, his words relieve me

A questionable heart....

AND stressful and worried heart..

I afraid I had chosen the wrong course for myself,

I afraid my ability to cope,

I starting to become lack of confidence,

Timid and tense up.

Rushing all the other's learning 

But yet i felt myself still a way from people's back,

Another cross-road for me now..

Another decision makers 

When i get many advice,

Encouragement words from my family, direct, seniors and course-mate..

It's just healing my body yet my soul is still confusing...

Until, one day my coursemate drag me to a big projects...

This is where i starting to grow back my confidence..

I still recall my friends saying,

They said I am a confident girl..

Everytime i just thinking : Is that I am??

Stay Tune...

The part 3 will be continue ...  

UKM part 1

Entering University approximately 3 months,
What i wanna to talk about is all regarding the activities and memories i cherished during these period.
Entering the university nearby my house,
The National University of Malaya (UKM)
the university that is 30 minutes from my house,
a place known as Bangi,
the small area next to my secondary school.
This is not the first choice that i choose but
I never choose for UKM
I chose UPM
Perhaps is faith,
the course i chosen never falls to me, instead i get Civil & Structural engineering..
Engineering, is the area I never thought of,
Especially civil engineering,
physic and all calculation,
Suddenly i lost my faith and confidence,
I become forceful and yet unhappy
Carrying all the expectation from my family,
I finally accept the offer and get into the second intake of UKM.
The university life isn't too bad for me,
The seniors are good and the coursemate of mine too...
For Chinese, I only have 3 coursemate which 2 girls and 1 boy..
It was a surprise for me as my course has majorities girls compare to boys..
It's actually a very minorities of boys
ratio boy to girl is 1:3
The week i entering my university,
I started to participate the pesta tanglung for my own college- KRK (college means hostel)

Next i started to join a series of activities :
It's followed by our faculty nights (Engineering Nights)
I was chosen as candidate which i need to perform with my partner- Ji Wang,
Started to face a lot of circumstances and problems
But the major problem comes from my heart which i do not dare to perform
I was timid and lack of confidence
But at last we did a great job although we did not get any prices but we truly enjoy it
Although it was a tiring experiences as we practiced until 4am in the morning

The 1st year to 4th Year Civil Engineering Members of 2013/2014

I feel that i'm a very lucky girl as i have the best seniors compare to other engineering department

They are Just good and awesome,

especially my direct seniors - Ng Chee Seng

A guy from Malacca, he is very helpful and patient,
He do help me a lot in my studies,
He teaches me if i have any question in my studies,
I really appreciate him as my direct senior,
as he not only pass his notes to me and help me during my sem 1 period,
He's is sometime childish but undeniable he is a good brother for me :)

Next is my second year seniors -
Ding feng dailou, Adeline da gajie, jit ming, pau lian and wai loon,
all of them are truly helpful, kind and friendly especially:
choong wai loon,
During in ukm, he gives me medicine to cure my cough,
and he is a caring and dedicate person,
he even open a tutorial class for all of us,
He is a talented person especially in drama :)

Nevertheless and a group of cute coursemate
Lee Ji Wang (my dailou)
Tee Su Ching (my dagajie)
And a youngest Tan Yik Jia from Sabah

We are a great team, and they are just Awesome!!!

We study, share information and take care of each other :)
The best coursemate ever...

My university life keep on going with a series of activities and
I had a twist turn of mindset during involving in one of the activities :)
Stay tune ...
The part 2 is coming ....

Hey

Hey,
I just couldn't sleep
wondering someday
i might get some sleep
tiring soul and upset mind
tiring eyes but heavy heart
insomnia
putting me into frustration
i just wanna say
Please give me some relaxation spaces

when impossible turns dark

Sometime I really think it is a joke for me,
Everyday i open my eyes is just like :

Oh, I needed to wait again..

When i needed to wait till?
It is like an endless road
I cant see my hope and future,
i told myself i needed to be positive,
but somehow disappointment comes
and i am now in depress mood,
I just dont understand why i keep falling down,
stand up is hard somehow
i have no way to stand up,
i never thought i dont even get an entry into the university
is it because of my results?
But there are people less pointer than me
but they succeed
i still a failure
searching for the plan B
But i found out money is really matter
What i wanted to study it seems i need to give up
in the kind cross station
what am i going to study
what i need to do'
it just like a mess for me
keep drowning
is it so difficult for me to continue my study?
My mother wanted me to enter a better university
and she never thought that better university need more money
change course
what i can study instead of what i wanted to study
when thing come to money matter
it just ruin up your thought
no money no talk world
struggle and exhausted
i wish i just can disappear from this world,
keep myself in a hut
to gain some peace
that all i need now

蓝月

如果我不再仰望天空
是否
我就失去了梦的自由？

遗忘

有时候

很想拚命留住什么

却握不住手中的余辉

生命中有许多的不可能

往往无法像电视情节皆大欢喜

生命或许必须经历许多的无奈和无助

但是我们往往都因承受不住而落荒而逃

失去常比不曾拥有幸福

毕竟失去让我们想起曾经拥有的痛苦记忆

如果

我们连记忆都无法停留

至少我们曾经体会喜怒哀乐的滋味

希望

或许对有些人来说是动力

可是往往的是残忍的渴望

当你渴望

总是追逐你的梦想

却没有机会将心中的梦留在指缝间

那是残忍的温柔

逐渐吞噬奋斗的意志力

多可悲的剧情

或许什么都不要会比较幸福

A place where Future belongs

Entering the 20^th June 2013, it seems like I have been months do not update my blog.

All of the sudden, I felt that I have nothing to write out;

Perhaps I just have no sense of writing it.

Entering the mid year of 2013,

What I can say is I actually entering a new path of life,

Since last year 2013,

I’m be working out as a general clerk in a company nearby my house area

Working life is totally different from study,

What can I say is,

When you make mistake during your study you can actually correct it

However there is no second chance for you doing the same mistakes

Be cautions of everything you do.

Sometime might be very busy but sometime you are boring as fallen asleep soon.

Daily repeating the same job everyday,

Makes your life dull

No excitement, freaking boring – Sien..

Haha

However life aren't always colourful and beautiful all the time,

Weekends are my precious moment,

I an actually have enough freedom to do what I want all the time,

I can play games, watch movie, listen to music, hanging out with friends, sleep etc

Al I know that this kind of life will be continue for nearly 2 months to go,

Because soon I will get my university acknowledgement by next month,

Kinda worry but I hope I can get what I want,

The problem is what course I wanted the most?

That is always been a question for me,

Since I wanted pharmacy so much for these years but I knew I cant get it

Due to me very very sucks result

Is it the right choice that I choose chemical engineering or nutrition as my future choices?

Facing a dilemma situation now

My future plans are all breaking up now

I need to re-strategy back my future,

But I still find the back way to alter all my problems condition now

Perhaps I can get the best for myself

But at this moment time being

I just still figuring what I am actually

Understand myself seems harder than others else,

I think I just lack of some confidences within myself

Regain back the strength to be cheerful and charming is a tough question for me

Because I always looks confident in front of people,

Having a strategy plan for my own

All i need to do is sit and wait for temporary moment 

and 

I need to get back into my express way soon

I will find it one day

No matter how long it takes

All it is about is being as me - Lee Wan Ying

The toughest thing is the life is compete and win yourself

But i take it as a challenge,

Life isn't all about challenging ??

march complication

Stepping into March,
The time where complication meets,
I just feel like walking in the jungle,
Seeing many pathway of road,
Which road should i take?
The left one, the right one,the middle one but it just cant step back,
Things just moving forward but i just hope somehow it can moves backward,
My result is going to release soon,
During Chinese new year, i went for prayers,
And i get a wish upon my god,
the result that the god give me isn't very good,
that time i just feel that I'm heading to the Earth,
What if i didn't manage to get what i expected?

And what I cant get the courses i wanted?
Many question starting to come in my mind,
What courses suit me and what i want,
Actually i all what i want or what can i get?
I think should be the second one rather than the first one,
i still remember when my spm result released,
my result just hanging in the middle of the grade,
Disappointment feel on top of me,
i cant go anywhere,
i just get into form six,
two years passes,
the time to get another results of mine,
I am afraid to face this awkward situation anymore,
it's determine my future,
my career,
my life.
nothing much i can do just let it be,
When this kind of feeling crush into vacation mood,
it create complication,
Actually I do have a the feeling of looking forward the vacation date,
Just because i need to online check all the hotel things, the places,
And i just peace off sometimes while communicate to some human being,
But i had pay for the air ticket,
if not, i wont get along with them
But bali sounds a great place for me,
I guess i will enjoy it,
4 days,
i need to take leave for my work
and besides working as clerk,
i am going to teach tuition,
money money money,
all my mind is just earning money,
need to pay a lot of fees while entering university.
if i have the chances i will never entering local university
i hope i can enter uk and japan university,
Hong kong and singapore also not bad,
but i wish i can get away from home,
experience life in a stranger country.
Nothing can do but just WAIT..

Happy working, 

The first.day of working during chinese new year.  

Sent from Samsung Mobile

Hello Lee Pei Khim,
Looks like going to confess to you,
Haha,
But Firstly i would like to wish you a very late Happy Belated Birthday to you my dear,
You Are Officially 20 year old this year,
Sound like 20 is a matured symbol,
Many things will dream of and many things have to do,
First of all,
maybe you can get a boyfriend soon, and kick me out in facebook relationship,
But I hope you will having a bright future,
Maybe can be your roommate if both of us get into NUS,
Hope you can will always be happy, cheerful, and pretty all the time - like now.

Next...
Happy Chinese New Year to you,
This year perhaps will be a memorable year for you,
because your birthday fall on the first day of chinese new year,
Huat ah,
Sure be good luck this year :)

Hmm.. opps looks like nothing to tell much,
And Lastly..
Happy Valentine Days..
Valentine although somehow means for couple,
but it do can celebrate among besties,
Best friend forever,
Maybe sister can be describe among us,
We can talk anything,
the things that happen in our life,
although we are not practices separate life,
having different friends,
different kinds of studies and stay in different area,
we are hardly to meet,
only couples of time in a year?
But i do hope our friendship will be continuing and keep connected until we become grandmother,
It is hard to maintain it,
But maybe we are the exception?
Haha..
7 years friendship,
sound like quite loooong,
But i felt time passes very fast,
still remember the first time we met in form 1,
but i forgot when we become so closed.
Apologize for my stubborn and easily angry attitude,
Sometime i easily get angry with people, and i get frustrated easily,
And the words i spoke may hurt you sometime,
But i do really appreciate you  as one of the people that brighten my high school life,
A person who cares of me,
A person who can always tolerate my tempered,
A person who plays very important role in my life,
I'm glad to meet you,
As your friends,
As your besties,
Will never forgot there is the one who hold my hand went through my teenagers life,
Thank you to you,
And All the best in your life.

Lee Pei KHim,
Happy Chinese New Year + Happy Belated Birthday + Happy Valentine Days

Happy Chinese New Year

The day turns hotter,
The sun is sparkling,
All heavy sunshine enter the house,
The housing area of mine,
Fully decorated with red tanglong, etc..
Everything in red,
Bright colour indicate the mood of Chinese nEw yEaR,
Yeah baby, It's chinese new year,
The year of the snake,
BUt i dont have the new year mood this year,
i dont know why,
perhaps when you grow elder,
you starting to worry many things,
and you need to help doing a lot of house chores,
It is absolutely tire,
Baking biscuit, baking cake, sweeping, mopping, cleaning house,
Arranging ect...
I am tire,
i need to do the work after i get back from my work place,
so i dislike it :(
But i get to having some break during chinese new year,
maybe will be doing some reunion with relative - but it is sucks
haha,
the most important is my baby brother is coming back,
so at least i can meet him again,
that is the most exciting things..
Well, just Happy Chinese New Year to everyone!!!!

Happy Chinese New Year

Outing with grace

Having a great time with one of my senior grace ng in pavillion for lunch, two of us went for steamboat. 

Full till no need eat for dinner. 

Have a great time with her .

Latest photo before work

Have a photo before going to work, what a nice day because im going to have a chinese new year break!!!!^ ^

The chinese new year mood with peacock in the garden, midvalley, malaysia.

THe News of 2013

It's 2013,
The feeling is not too strong for this year,
But this is the longest time i spent with my little brother,
He had to wait for his o-level result in order to get a place for a-level,
So he went back late than usual, earlier January,
And he back in Jan a week later,
I manage to do some shopping with him,
Actually i manage to talk to him more compare to last time,
Not sure why,
As i grow elder, i hope i can do better in relationship area,
Either Friendship or Family.

Stepping into the 20th year of my birth,
I gonna say goodbye to all my teen,
No more teen for me,
I do appreciate it very much,
Learn to share and learn to protect myself,
Neither you or me is going to let me down,
I do have a grey time in past couple weeks I keep having doubt to myself,
Keep thinking that i cant do everything i had thought off,
The feeling is terrible and it ruin my day very well,
I started to afraid of facing my result that is going to release soon in march,
I lost all my confident in all of the sudden,
I started to become weak and i have no faith at all to myself,
And i dont express my weakness to everyone,
maybe i just not familiar to do this because i used to be a listener, rather than a speaker,

Almost more than i month, i kept myself into struggle,
That time i havent found any job yet, so i really have a rainy day all the time.
Because i keep facing failure in my life,
The emotional is not too stable perhaps some parts due to my female hormones,
I dont know why my friends always trust me to be a confident, strong and of course determine person,
They found me ambitious,
But i dont get any of it within myself sometimes,
maybe libra just always suspicious to themselves,

In this 2013, I always hope my dream come true,
But in reality it come in the others way,
It really disappoint me,
however,
I'm still figuring out who am I,
Maybe others may understand more about myself rather than I do,
Double standard feeling keep loitering,
I still thinking the best future for me,
I still wondering between nutrition and pharmacy courses,
And i still hope that i manage to get in NUS or University of Tokyo rather than malaysia public university, Just wish i can have the chances to explore the outer world than kept myself in a small area,
I' not sure whether my dream come true but everything i wish is not a dream to me anymore.
I'm not that blogger type who have many colorful picture or interesting stories,
I wrote just about what I'm thinking,
Expressing in my own world, keep myself secure,
although i have no visitors,



...................... Just being who I am.