Grey

It seems like after shifting my blog her, i totally have no comments,
well, but i think it's okay,
what i wrote is just want to express my feeling,
what i think and what have I been going through all this while,
Suddenly i felt I'm getting down the hill,
being like an old man,
But yet, i have about few month to go before facing exam,
I dont know why i behave weird this year,
just i cant concentrate very well,
when exam,
i felt very very sleepy,
my hands were shivering ,
during exam i cant even think of something,
nothing come out from my brain,
it makes me panic,
and i do not know why,
i felt a little bit dismay at myself,
Disappointment toward myself,
A deep disappointment,
somehow i cry after my exam,
i dont even want to face it,
because i fear,
i know i cant accept the fact - the marks i receive,
i just a coward,
I dont even can face myself,
it brought depression,
it really hurt me,
my teacher doesnt scold me,
she understand me,
instead she give me huge encouragement,
i appreciate it very much,
I dont know what's going on,
but i wish to adjust myself,
toward the new challenges,
fight is better than flight,
And
I believe i can do it,
Dont you too? 

Dismay

Suddenly i felt very depress today, a little bite of dismay,
The feeling is worst,
I cant even drive smoothly today,
nearly i met an accident,
What's wrong with me,
Cant even concentrate very well,
focus,
What am i doing?
I think I'm going to Fail in my chemistry paper,
When i see the question,
i was shivering,
My brain is 99% blank,
What is that, and how about that?
I dont even remember at all,
I didnt finish studying my organic chemistry,
Even the chapter i had finished,
I yet cant remember at all,
All about oxidation, reflux, addition, neutrophilic, electrophillic,
All process mixing up together,
I forgot Sb is antimony,
I felt very bad today,
my mood is totally disrupted,
I feel like shouting,
My mood is now at maximum stages,
feel like going to be insane soon,
i still have my bio and math paper to go,
I never felt this before,
All my cell had been stress up to the max,
I couldnt sleep well,
sleep couple hour and study,
but yet i still cant answer the question,
i just want to express,
express all my ill-feeling,
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